I was going to utterly ignore the Anna Nicole Smith story; the story of her life and those around her was bad enough. But the media buzz around her death . . . oh, my goodness. So how much lower can it go than this: Zsa Zsa Gabor's husband: I could be Smith baby's father

Von Anhalt, who is Gabor's eighth husband, said he and Smith first met in the 1990s when Smith was still married to elderly oil tycoon J. Howard Marshall II. He said Smith approached him and Gabor at the Plaza Hotel in New York.

"She was a very big fan of Zsa Zsa and wanted to be like Zsa Zsa," he said. "She wanted to be a princess."

He said the two started an affair soon after, meeting over the years in Los Angeles, San Francisco and New York. For much of that time, he said, Smith urged him to make her a princess like his wife.

But short of divorcing the actress, he said the only solution would have been adopting Smith. Von Anhalt said he did consider that and even filled out adoption papers, but Gabor refused to sign them.

So Zsa Zsa has a stroke, so he tries to adopt Anna Nicole Smith? I can understand wanting, maybe, a pet, but wow. How loathsome. I feel diminished as a human being just reading about it.

So how low will it go?